The One about when love first struck
I decided to spend some time with my wifey since I was making good progress with my master assignment. Knowing that there had been a change in operator at the heeren marche ( it was replaced by a new concept food centre known as the Village… YMCA…) So decided to go with my wifey for a relaxing dinner from the usual babysitting chores.
Having a dinner at 6 plus at Orchard road on a friday evening seem to be relative early as it was barely packed at the village. The admission was hassle free, no queue even at the pseudo looking Marche looking Village( they probably save up a lot on renovation… other than the signboard changes and the investment in the new uniform)
As I tucked in my delicious lamb stew, I happen to glance at a table about 6 meter away from the pizza counter. There seated a family, a boy of 2 years old and a little girl who look like barely a year old. Together with the maid, they were enjoying their dinner. But what caught my attention was the mother. She was dressed in a pair of dark red 3 quarter pants which was not at all flattering. In a worn out t-shirt and equally unflattering flip flops, she started to look at the items on the menu board on top of the pizza counter.
She looked a tab plump, flabby arms and posterior not withstanding but the features were unmistakeable. Her baby face look, her innocent look, the one that memerised me about 13 years ago. The one who was so close to me when I was in my JC. We would share a same walkman ( there was no mp3 player or ipod or even discman then) as we sang to the tune of Liang Weng Fu ( a Singaporean composer). She was my little baby sister who I always thought I will shield and protected. She was the first girl who I would take a bus to my junior college when she was studying for her promos exam and send her back to Clementi and take the long bus trip back to toa payoh. She was the one whom I waited for my visitation when I was in Nee Soon Camp for my Basic Military Training. She was the one who I asked to go to the BMT Post-out-Parade (POP) and the one whom I asked to be my girlfriend on a romantic cruise. She was the one whom my camp mates and my buddy said bring the sparkle in my eyes. She was the one who I sang Rick Price’s “Heaven Knows” when I am having my shower which of course made my army mates cringe.
My wife noticed that I was having that lost-in-space look and asked me if I am ok. I was deep in thoughts and started to share with her during dinner. I told her that she was the only case which I have absolute no idea why we broke up. It happened so sudden. She was having her A levels and told me that she would like to concentrate. I was told not to call her for 2 months which I did as a dutiful boyfriend. When I did call her 2 months later she was cold and our conversation become monosyllabic, to the extreme that there was awkward silence. I remember when we last meet before the breakup at kallang bahru,she returned everything to me and said goodbye. Even much persistent attempts to ask what went wrong, she left the KFC restaurant, the very one which we spend countless hours sharing our dreams together. To cap the lousy day, I was at Kallang watching the Musical “Cats” with an empty seat beside me. Till now the song “Memory” still reminds me of that.
Thinking back I havent seen her for almost 10 years. The last time I saw her was in my uni days. in fact it was quite an awkward experience. There I was, carrying my trusty haversack and she was at the canteen getting some food. She said hi in her usual megawatt smile and ask me how's things. without waiting for a reply, she walk past with a tray of food. And that was the last time I saw her.
My wife may have never heard me talk about this. Maybe it is just that unwritten rule not to talk about our exs. But I guess with Vernice into the family and after 4 years of marriage, both of us are comfortable to accept and hear about how our journey of love came to the point when we meet. Ever as curious, she took some glances and even went to the extreme of walking near her so as to have a look of this girl who stole her husband teenage heart then. In an egoistic and smirk look, she declared that she is better than her. She even asked me in a surprising generous portion of generosity to go over and say hi, and bringing her along like some trophy of victory :P
In fact I had to admit she look really different. Being a mother of 2 apparently took toll on her. In fact she look a little like the present day Chen Li Ping of then “Aiyoyo” fame. I resisted to say hi even after much urging and egging by my wife. I walked away, stealing glances at the picture of family bliss and contentment. In fact at this point of time, I was wondering whether I should have just go over and say hi graciously, shake hand with her husband and played with her little ones. Then I resisted this opportune moment. Maybe it will take me another 10 years to see her again. Maybe I will never know why we ended up breaking up. But I am glad she was part of my life at some point of time and I am glad for the life that I have now. Maybe it was just that we were all learning from each other to prepare ourselves for the persons that we are with now.
At this point, the only song I could think of was this:
我躲在车里
手握著香槟
想要给你
生日的惊喜
你越走越近
有两个声音
我措手不及
只得楞在那里
我应该在车底
不应该在车里
看到你们有多甜蜜
这样一来
我也比较容易死心
给我离开的勇气
他一定很爱你
也把我比下去
分手也只用了一分钟而已
他一定很爱你
比我会讨好你
不会像我这样孩子气
Maybe… Maybe…
P.S my wifey think that I am getting into bout of depression....
